Cooking with your partner should be fun, not stressful. But sometimes when you’re both in the kitchen, things get quiet. The only sounds are the sizzle of oil and the tap of a knife. And quiet can feel awkward. That’s where a good cooking playlist comes in, but not just any playlist. I’m talking about a playlist that gets you both singing out loud together.

There is something powerful about singing with another person. It makes you feel connected. When you’re chopping vegetables and your partner is stirring the sauce, and a song you both love comes on, you can’t help but join in. Even if your voices sound like a pair of dying cats, it doesn’t matter. The point isn’t to sound good. The point is to share that goofy, happy moment.

Think about it. When was the last time you sang with your partner? Not in the car, not at a concert, but in your own kitchen, holding a spatula like a microphone? If you can’t remember, you are missing out. Singing together breaks down walls. It makes you look dumb in front of each other, and that is a good thing. Being willing to be silly together is a huge part of building emotional intimacy. You can’t be close to someone if you never let them see your goofy side.

So how do you build a great singing playlist for cooking? First, pick songs you both know the words to. It doesn’t have to be love songs. It can be old pop, classic rock, country, even Disney songs. Whatever makes you both smile. The key is that you can belt out the chorus without reading the lyrics on your phone. When you both know the words, you can sing them at the same time, and something magical happens. Your breathing starts to sync up. Your movements get in rhythm. You’ll find yourself chopping onions on the same beat, stirring in time with the melody. Cooking becomes a dance.

Don’t overthink the song choices. You don’t need a fancy playlist that “matches the cuisine.“ You’re making tacos? Great, put on some trashy 90s pop. Making lasagna? Sing opera if you want. The food doesn’t care. What matters is that you both feel the vibe. If a song makes you laugh, keep it. If it makes you want to slow dance in the middle of a flour mess, keep it. If it makes you want to turn up the volume and scream the chorus like a rock star, definitely keep it.

Another thing: put the music on a speaker, not headphones. You have to hear each other. And when you sing, sing to your partner. Look them in the eye while you nail (or completely miss) that high note. That eye contact is gold for your relationship. It says, “I see you, I hear you, and I’m happy to be in this messy kitchen with you.“

I remember one time my partner and I were making spaghetti. We had a huge argument earlier in the day. The kitchen was tense. Then “Bohemian Rhapsody” came on. Neither of us planned to sing, but when the “Galileo” part hit, we both started belting it out. By the time we got to “Nothing really matters,“ we were laughing so hard we were crying. The argument disappeared. That’s the power of a silly sing-along. You cannot stay mad at someone when you’re both trying to hit a Freddie Mercury note and failing.

Singing together also lowers stress. Cooking can be stressful when things go wrong. You burn the garlic, you cut your finger, you drop an egg. That’s when a goofy song can save the night. Instead of getting frustrated, turn up the volume and sing about your disaster. Make up silly lyrics. “I burnt the garlic, but that’s okay, I love you anyway.“ It turns a frustrating moment into a memory.

If you want to take it to the next level, start a tradition. Every time you cook together, add one new song to your playlist. Over time, that playlist becomes a time capsule of your relationship. Every song will remind you of a specific meal, a specific laugh, a specific mess you cleaned up together.

So here is my advice. Next time you cook with your partner, put down the recipe book for a minute. Pick up the wooden spoon like it’s a microphone. Pick a song you both love. Sing loud. Sing wrong. Sing like nobody is listening, because in your kitchen, only one person matters, and that person is right there with you, holding a spatula, about to join in.

Cooking together is about more than making food. It’s about making connection. And there is nothing that connects two people faster than sharing a laugh while singing at the top of their lungs. So go ahead. Hit play. Open your mouth. Let the good times roll, and let the spaghetti burn just a little bit. It’s worth it.